general

As usual, Phil McGraw is steps ahead of the rest of us in sorting out what is *really* going on in relationships.

Refreshingly, he begins the book by questioning the therapeutic standards too often given to the thousands of couples in trouble. "The divorce rate in America refuses to drop below fifty percent, and twenty percent of us will divorce not once but twice in our lifetime. Clearly, pleasant and generic instructions on how to communicate better or theoretical musings that give you great insights about relationships just weren't going to cut it fifteen years ago and won't cut it now. " Obviously (to paraphrase him), couples therapy as we have known it isn't working.

You can watch him often on Oprah, but this book is the next best thing to either watching him there, or having him as your personal therapist.

This book is primarily for relationships 'on the rocks' - the first steps are set up to evaluate and understand what your relationship is, how it got this way (no surprise, it didn't fall apart on its own, or because of your partner). The Seven Steps are not simple or simplistic, but provide structure for thought and more. This book is not about what's wrong with your partner and how to fix him or her. It is about the person reading the book -- you!

This would be a great book for new couples to read together (and for this price, why not order one for you and one for your loved one, and read them first in private, then together), not just before they are in crisis, but before they decide to marry. When the relationship is still strong, new, fresh, it is more likely that both people will be willing to talk openly about what they expect and want, and to be able to use the truly helpful instructions on how to stay together.

For those in a troubled relationship, you might want to read this yourself first, and work on your own issues. Dr. Phil has a directness that can be intimidating to some - but for some of us, we need that extra push. This book is on my must have list for newlyweds as well as those in trouble.

Highly recommended for those who truly want that relationship to work!

Do not buy this book unless you are serious about examining yourself closely and acheiving real improvement in your closest relationships. Dr. Phil is no nonsense! He comes on strong and won't let you get away with blaming all your problems on your spouse. As a result, people either seem to love him or hate him. If you are not ready to face up to your own mistakes then this is probably not the book for you. He makes you admit and take responsibility for your own bad behavior first. This approach is not for the faint of heart. It requires a lot of work, however I have found that it has helped me tremendously. I have faced my own actions that were causing most of the problems I was experiencing in my marriage. Previously, I had been blaming most of the problems on my wife. It seems simple, but Dr. Phil continually reminds the reader throughout this book that we can only change ourselves. This simple fact has forced me to get real and to look at my relationships in a new light. I highly suggest you buy this book, but don't do it unless you are ready to make a commitment to change!

Me & my s/o have had problems from day one but we both tried to cover it up and work through them. After a year engagement we decided to set a date and plan the wedding. Something explosive happened in our relationship and we were at our end, the wedding was cancelled. It has caused us to basically give up and seperate. This is the last thing both of us wanted to do especially with 2 young children, but we didn't know what else to do but to take a break from one another, so I am setting to leave. After watching the relationship rescue episodes of Dr. Phil on television, I said I have to get this book - this is my only hope. I'm not even done with the book and I already feel confident that my relationship will work out just fine with time and dedication. Dr. Phil is down to earth, he doesn't play any games. I listen to the CD in my car on my way home from work since I never have time to read. Make sure you buy the Relationship Rescue workbook along with it! If your partner wants your relationship to be rescued he will go through this workbook with you. The CD will lift you up in ways you can't imagine...when everything else fails - you need to buy this cd!