economics

One might well characterize this famous author as the Ben Franklin of our era; a kindly philosopher dispensing wit and wisdom. Wherever you are in life, his tried, proved observations on how to get along with your fellow man (without manipulation) will help you get more of what you want. The overwhelming proof lies in the fact that over 15 million copies have been sold, and it has been translated into every known written language.

Why this is an American classic is best summed up in a quote from the jacket: "The sole purpose of this book is to help you solve the biggest problem you face: The problem of getting along with and influencing people in your everyday business and social contacts."

Carnegie referred to his book as "A working handbook on human relations" and so it is. He sets down nine principles that change attitude and behavior along with true stories. The story examples may seem a bit dated, but don't let it bother you that you don't know the people mentioned in the book. It's easy to fit contemporary personalities into them and the end result is the same. Bedrock principles of human behavior are revealed and illustrated.

A few Carnegie gems: "It's easier to criticize and condemn than it is to try to understand where the other person is coming from. "Keep in mind that people are not creatures of logic, but rather of emotion, pride, vanity and prejudice. "The deepest urge in people is the desire to be important. "Exude courage, frankness and good cheer. "If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. "Welcome disagreement, distrust your first impressions, control your temper, thank opp9onents for their interest, postpone action until you think it through. "People usually have at least two reasons for doing something: one that sounds good and the real reason. "Nothing works in every situation. "Dramatize what you have to present. "Make it vivid and interesting. "Praise lavishly and show honest appreciation."

Once you thoroughly understand what Author Carnegie is saying about how to get along with people and get what you both want, it's easy to practice the principles. But we forget, so it's a good idea to have your personal copy and re-read it at least once a year. Pick up a copy just to have it around.

Dale Carnegie's tome to people skills is every bit as relevant today as it was in 1936 (a time when the job market was tough or tougher than today's tight one) when he first wrote this gem. I had always been off put by the title, "How to Win Friends and Influence People." To me it always slightly scented of manipulation, the effortful practiced skill of acting in such a way to "win" over friends as if they didn't come naturally and the people-pawned language of the word, "influence." A more apropos title might be, "The Art of Living."

Many of the ideas are echoed years later in Steven Covey's, "7 Habits of Highly Successful People," for good reason...they are timeless. The concept of valuing humanity never turns with the times. Carnegie engagingly reminds us of the power of a name and the importance to work on knowing and using another's name. He speaks of listening, showing genuine interest in what another has to say, argument avoidance, showing sincere appreciation, and does so in easy to remember and practiceable dictums.

It's a book to be read, a book to be practiced, a book to be given. It's a book that keeps on giving, a book that makes you more human and in such a way you'll find yourself as an afterthought gaining friends and keeping company with people wonderful people.

When it comes to social skills, this book says it all. No need to look any further than this classic. To learn emotional and mental mastery and making the most of any situation, then Optimal Thinking: How To Be Your Best Self is your best choice. To learn how to deal with change, read Who Moved My Cheese. These resources give you all you need to be your best, get along with others and bring out the best from them.