Abandoned Forum

[vampress]

I try not to be offensive to anyone. If you have jokes like this please post

You might be dead if you are walking down the street and someone goes ghost white.

[Mysti]

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her
nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his
name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows
the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant,
about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank
manager and disappears into a back office.


She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out

there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to
use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

(wait for it)


















(you're gonna love this)















The bank manager looks back at her and says............

"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan.

His old man's a Rolling Stone."

[nowhere man]

HA! good one heres mine:

What did batman say to robin when he wanted robin to get out of the batmobile?



Get out of the batmobile robin

[Astarte]

This isn't funny!

[lycan]

u might be a red neck if u see a cattle car with cattle in it and
say hamburgers or could be ariel halford who ever that is

[Mysti]

Q What is a quaker?
A a posh sounding duck...

[vampress]

your sitting on the side of the road listening to some music and you start singing along. Your singing and the lyrics say 'hit me' and you follow it. so someone kicks you in the side of the head. (mean person should have checked first)

[lycan]

u ahve a sister who is completly anoiing or u could person

[lycan]

just close your eyes and pic this
a snail is playing golf and when he hits is ball into a neiboring green
he gose to fecht the ball and when he gets there he finds the ball in some
ones drive way

not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol: not:lol:

[Astarte]

There was just a dog fight

A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?"

"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"

"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him..."

"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly. "How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?"

"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"

[lycan]

that was good



true story

a girl ask were her pencil is
someone gives her a pencil
then someone in her next class pulls her first pencil out of her hair
and says y didnt u go with the bun

dont ask i had it dont to me

[Math_nerd]

What is the toughest part about eating a vegtable?










Getting them out of their wheelchair!

<hee hee hee, I love children....>

[lycan]

that was good



so what is the easyiest way to convuse a blonde

talk to her

[Astarte]

An 80 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting. When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?"
She replied: a can of peaches.

The judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied that she was hungry.

The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied 6.

The judge then said, "I will give you 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

He said, "What is it?"



The husband said "She also stole a can of peas."

[lycan]

that was strange



subject: an irishman


so and irish man goes convession and he says to his conveser i almost
had an afiar on my wife
the convesor said what do u mean almost and the irishman said
well we took our clothes off and rubbed together
and the conversor said rubing to gether is the same as putting it in
u r to say 5 hail marys and then putt $50 in the poor box

so he said his prayers and then he went over to the poor box and

stood there for awhile and the conversor who was whatching him said
wiat u didnt put the money in and
the irishman said yea but i rubbed it against the bos and according to u
rubbing it together is the same as putting it in